Swings and roundabouts

Well, what a palaver of a week I’ve had (you might want to settle down on the sofa with a cuppa) – alongside some amazing ‘pinch me’ moments, too. This is my fourth week living with my Nan in Watford, and while I’m really enjoying having a full-time job that’s challenging me everyday, balancing the social side is proving a bit too much…

I’m not one to turn down drinks, and for some inexplicable reason that I can’t really seem to help I’m always the final one at the party. But when the last train home is at 11:58pm, that’s something I’m going to have to work on. My first appearance at ‘after-work drinks’ lead to me missing the last train home and learning the hard way that it’s not like Wales and an Uber to Watford costs £46 (although trip to Maccie’s was included).

Last Thursday I was lucky enough to be invited to a Topshop event with a group of super lovely ladies to celebrate the campaign we’ve been working on through the Zyper app. It was hosted at Blame Gloria – a very cool bar in Covent Garden with amazing decor and great cocktails. I’m trying desperately hard to fit my social life around work so of course I headed straight there and planned to leave after a couple of drinks.

Like I mentioned before, this becomes an impossible task for me after a few red wines and I ended up being one of the last ones standing (still in time to catch my train at that point, might I add). To cut a long story short: I left my personal phone in an Uber after helping a fellow blogger get home safely and consequently missed the Watford train, but managed to get to Harrow-on-the-Hill and so only paid £15 for my taxi this time (no Maccie’s included).

I only bought the shitty iPhone 6 a few months ago and since then I’ve dropped it and had the screen fixed twice, dropped it again and stuck some tape over the crack after accepting I’m so uselessly clumsy there’s no point in fixing it, and complained about it being slow constantly. But it’s funny how attached you find you are to an item you want to throw off a bridge daily once you lose it. I’m not bothered about the actual phone itself but it has all my photos on it which aren’t backed up (something you’d think I would have learnt to do after going through approximately three iPhones a year).

I counted my losses (luckily I have a work phone with this job – which I will be guarding with my life) and headed off to party in Newcastle for a good friend’s birthday. Despite having a notoriously rocky relationship with trains I put my brave face on and travelled up on one because the drive is 5 hours of soul-crushing motorway. To my surprise had the most productive journey getting blogs done, painting my nails and finishing a book.

This midi dress is another kind gift from Boden, and it’s just a dream. The vintage, button-down style fills me with joy and I can’t wait to get more wear out of it as spring hurries on it’s way (realised way too late this isn’t the most practical piece to sport in the snow). I’m imagining it with Dad-sandals and a big floppy hat for exploring when the weather warms up. In my opinion polka dots are always a winner – I can’t say no to them and I haven’t been proven wrong yet…

I’m a big lover of the girly / grungy look that comes hand in hand with wearing floaty dresses with chunky boots and this combination captures that so well. Throw a pearly handbag and an edgy backdrop in the mix and the clash becomes even better. The intricate pleat details and slightly puffy sleeves give the dress a sophisticated and almost retro uniform feel (like I’m an extra in the Railway Children), teased with just the right amount of plunge neckline and emboldened by the rich red colouring (I’m cashing this in as my dancing lady emoji moment).

DRESS Boden (gifted) | BAG Topshop (gifted – similar here) | BOOTS Dr Martens (Depop)

If you’re thinking that this post is a little more revealing than usual – it is. I don’t often share the in-depth details of my personal life on here, but I’ve been inspired by Dolly Alderton’s refreshingly honest, laugh-out-loud-on-the-tube-funny memoir, Everything I Know About Love (super late to the party, I know). I’m only a few chapters in but it’s saving my commute from total desperation and genuinely has me in stitches on the train to the point where people actually stare at me as if I’m in pain.

Anyway, while I mostly share notes on whatever outfit I’m loving at the moment interspersed with some updates and maybe a little anecdote, I’ve come to the realisation that this doesn’t really represent me as a person. I want this blog to be honest, I want it be fun and I want it to be a reflection of me – and up until now I’m not sure if it really does that.

I want to come across as whole-heartedly myself – even if that means divulging a few embarrassing stories (because trust me, my life is full of them) and I feel like I’ve built this space up for long enough now to be able to do that. I don’t want to be a ‘role model’ or another blogger that blends into the rest; I want to be myself, because that’s all I really know how to be. I’m comfortable to share my true lifestyle on other social media – like posting drunken selfies on Intstagram and being sassy as fuck on twitter, so I don’t know why it seems like a challenge here.

So I’m Lily, just another twenty-one year-old: I get drunk and make mistakes, I don’t really know what I’m doing half the time and I have no idea whatsoever where I’m going in life, but that’s what makes it all the more fun, right?

Picture me on my train home from Newcastle Sunday afternoon: violently hungover, carrying my laptop, enormous suitcase and handbag, incredibly pleased with myself that I’d managed not to fuck up my booking. My Trainline ticket wouldn’t activate for some reason, and when I informed the ticket man he pointed out that it wouldn’t activate because I had in fact booked it for the third of March, not the third of February. Life didn’t seem so fun when I literally started crying in front of him and then had to pay £77 for a new ticket, sitting on my uncomfortable suitcase without the seat I presumed I had eating a warm smoked salmon sandwich.

But the little mistakes that seem like disasters at the time always turn out to make the best stories – and the frequency of them in my life means I’m never short of things to say.

Lil x

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